Random: Lacking any definite plan or recognised order: Completely without order. I’ve been married twice now. Both times to women so I’m doing well in some ways. But as far as I can discern, life doesn’t make any sense and never has done so. And certainly my own life has always been totally without order or plan. And it’s certainly not “my story” or “my journey” that I carefully mapped out. Every part of my life has been endless short films with myriads of different directors. And these directors didn’t have scripts or didn’t know what they were doing or perhaps the scripts were so chaotic they couldn’t pull all the scenes together to create something coherent. I’m not complaining but it is blatantly obvious that life is random. Not just my life but everybody’s life. You think (make that hope) that you have done what the self–help gurus suggest in mapping your future: MAP. Make a plan and you’ll be in control. Yeah right, in control for a few days or a few months if you are lucky.
You decide to study hard in a chosen field and get a job only to discover it’s not what you hoped. So you change direction only to find you dislike this career more than the first! Or you miss your flight and they re-book you on another where you find yourself talking to the woman seated next to you and the end result is you move in together and spend the next three years with one another. All random. Uncharted. Unplanned. Who said, “Life is what happens to you while you’re making other plans”.
John Lennon. He got that correct. Then he moved from the U.K. to New York and got shot dead in a park. There’s lots of humour and loads of wisdom prevalent in the saying “If you want to give God a big laugh tell him your plans”.
Days turn into weeks then months and your plans are belting along like clockwork. You have a smile on your face and you’re confident because “everything is going to plan” until the driver in front brakes unexpectedly and you end up in hospital for six weeks and your leg has been amputated. Those plans just evaporated. “Everything happens for a reason.” We’ve all heard it so many times and you probably use it yourself. Now really, who is the genius behind that phrase! What was the reason for the accident? You were simply driving too fast or you were looking at your phone…that’s the only reason. Or you missed that plane because you didn’t allow enough time. It’s all random but millions out there believe “they are destined to meet the love of their life in some wonderful circumstances.” They actually believe their life has been scripted! Can they be serious? Seriously unbalanced more likely! Oh yeah! You really are going to meet someone, get married, have three beautiful, healthy kids, get cancer at thirty nine and then it’s all over. Sorry but you are not going to meet a Brad Pitt look alike or your Miss Perfect! Oh spare me the teenage dreams or scenes from third rate movies. “There is no other destiny than the one you forge for yourself.” (Thank you John Paul Satre) And when the forging is over just hope no calamities occur along the road to that destiny.
So will you continue to say “Oh that was meant to happen?” Of course you will, simply because platitudes sit comfortably and reassure us. But think before you say this nonsense. It happened because you were in the same class (by chance) or the same bar (by chance) or at the same dinner party (by chance) and by chance you met. Chance was the only reason. Jump to any conclusion you like but no-one has any idea what is going to happen tomorrow let alone next year or next decade.
And don’t go blaming the movie directors (or screenwriters) who were shooting the scenes where you commenced a job or you walked into a florist shop and you became attracted to the girl behind the counter and ended up marrying her even though, ironically, you bought flowers that day for someone else!
In spite of the evidence, no doubt some will cling with great tenacity to belief in the stars and what the astrologers and psychics tell you. Over eight billion people on this planet and you still seriously believe there is someone or something (or some Force?) up there in the clouds (or hiding some place) with a giant computer and they are writing destiny charts or screenplays for all of us? Or will only some special people be selected by these “planners?” You really must be off with the pixies if you believe your destiny awaits.
I have a mate who believed he would become a golf professional and successful international player. He was destined for greatness and worked hard to create it. To support himself in the early days he worked nights in a bakery and practiced each and every day until one night when he left four fingers in the bread slicer. A random accident. Was that his real destiny So give up the juvenile ideas and make your ‘destiny’ happen. Build it. Write it. Create it. And make the future of your choice. Or will you cling to a random fairy tale such as winning a lottery. Seize the day. Seize the dream. And beat it into shape. If that dream fades or falls apart, ditch it and dream again. “Seize the day, one day at a time” said the Romans.
Seventeen people die in a bus accident. One survivor. Random. A village is demolished by an earthquake. Four hundred die. Twenty two survive. Random. A plane crash. Two hundred and eighty die. Six survive. Random. Random attacks. Random meetings. Random accidents. Random escapes. Random deaths. Life is random. Life is a mystery.
Gold Coast, April 2017
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